The truth is, I always thought I was one strong Mama!
I know I’ve raised a confident little girl. She’s eager to make friends, not afraid to meet new people, and certainly doesn’t hesitate to speak her mind!
It wasn’t until the first day of school that I realized how insecure I really am…her first day of school.
My daughter was starting Kindergarten this year, and I (like most Mom’s new to the school scene!) planned every detail. Seriously, I prepared like a “retail apocalypse” was coming, and if we didn’t have it now, the world would implode!
I had snacks, lunch bags, backpacks (yup…backpacks is PLURAL!), indoor and outdoor shoes, a few lunchtime treats, the whole nine yards. I was feeling confident and sure that I rocked this school prep game so hard, that the Principal himself was going to call me up and give me an award in front of all the other parents, just for how epically prepared I was!
A girl can dream…right?!
Anyway, the first day of school came, we arrived early, and my mind went blank.
Every inch of confidence, every part of my mind that was sure I’d done everything right, suddenly disappeared…and was quickly replaced with the opposite.
My surety was immediately replaced with doubt, fear, and a bit of anxiety over the choices I’d made, and what others would think about me as a parent.
I was suddenly sure that everyone was judging me as a Mother, and began to question every decision I’d made up until that point…
“Will she be too hot in what she’s wearing? I should have packed extra clothes.”
“Should I have packed that treat in her lunch? I bet the teachers will think she eats junk food all the time at home.”
And funnily enough, it developed into…
“Ugh, I probably look like I just rolled out of bed. I should have dressed up more for her first day.”
Never in a million years would I have thought these things, or even thought that I would think these things.
As I walked home, baffled by what had just happened, I realized one important and scary thing that my Mom always used to tell me…if you’re feeling/thinking this, someone else is too.
Other Mom’s were thinking the same thoughts, worrying about the same trivial things like what they were wearing, and that people would think she was a horrible Mom for giving her child a treat with her lunch.
Since that realization, I’ve made a change.
I so quickly felt defeated that day, and like I wasn’t a suitable parent for my healthy, happy, smart little girl….SCREW THAT!
I don’t ever think anyone should have a chance to feel those things, ever.
So I hope you’ll join me in my efforts to encourage, support, and reach out to your fellow parents at school.
Comment on their child’s clothing. “Jason looks so warm in that jacket, I’m a little jealous!”
Tell them if your child says nice things about their child. “Laura tells me that Jacob is the nicest boy in class!”
Remind them they are great parents. “Listen to your little girl, she is so smart!”
Make them feel good about themselves. “I LOVE your shoes! Where did you get them?”
These may seem like small talk, but to someone who is feeling like I was on the first day of school, you will completely change their way of thinking, the way they feel about themselves as a parent!
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THIS POST WAS WRITTEN BY JULIA:
Julia is all about rocking “Mom life” in every way! She has a husband of 7 years, is mom to a spirited 3 year old daughter, and lives in Niagara Region, ON, Canada. Check her out on RockItLikeAMom.com for lots of easy recipes, DIY projects, parenting articles, and up front Mom talk!
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