Have you heard the quote…
You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. — by Jim Rohn
Every time I read it, it gets me seriously thinking about who I am around and how they influence me. I can absolutely see the truth of it as I look back through my life, some connections create negative effects and other’s creating positive change in my life. It all depended on who, when, and what was going on in my life.
In my life right now, I have a friend who, without even realizing it, constantly pushes me to grow. She’s an amazing influence and I always walk away from conversations with her inspired to improve. The best part is, those changes somehow feel easier after talking with her.
While I feel like I owe this beautiful friend, I know she learning and being challenged by me too. That’s the beauty of our friendship.
So how do we come to find more of these kinds of people?
First, stop stressing. Take a deep breath and come to a place of calm. It will be easier to think and it will help attract better energy (and therefor better friendships) to your life.
Let’s talk about this energy and vibration for a second. Energy is seriously the coolest thing! Different levels of energy attract different kinds of things, they attract things that have a similar vibration or energy as themselves. The more we can keep “moving up levels” awesome things will just begin to happen. Remember learning, “you reap what you sow.” It rings true here.
How to Surround Yourself with Better People
#1. Personal Growth
Daily you and I should be taking the time to grow. When we seek wisdom and understanding as the most important thing in our life, everything else, as if by magic, starts to fall into place.
When I first started my blogging business, I spent countless hours researching and trying to grow my Facebook and Pinterest following. Then one day, I realized I was fighting all day long and not seeing the results I wanted. I soon realized I was spending my energy in the wrong place. I then shifted my mindset and starting focusing on serving my readers more, pinning and sharing other great content (that wasn’t mine) that would help others more, and I started writing from a deeper place in my heart with less expectations.
I got into this new habit for a while and then one day I looked up and my Facebook following had grown to 30,000 and my Pinterest to 125,000. It’s not millions and millions but there was a lot more peace and flow in my life and that matters much more to me.
Things fell into place naturally and more easily after I became more spiritually aligned and started working with my talents instead of constantly fighting the flow.
This has been true in more than just my business.
The more you grow, the more confident you will become, the more spiritually aligned you will be, and the more naturally things will fall into place, like friendships. Amazing friends are out there and they are waiting for you to raise to the occasions so they can attract themselves to you.
#2. You May Never Meet Some of Your “Five People”
This might be the coolest one of all. It’s one that didn’t fall into place in my life until I started focusing on daily personal growth and then I realized I had amazing influential people at my fingertips.
Some of the most influential people in my life are people I have never met. They have shared their powerful inspiration with me even without meeting face to face. They do so through books, podcasts and even through TV episodes (I’m looking at Johanna Gaines). Many of these great authors, teachers, and family oriented souls I will never meet in person and yet I absolutely include them in the “five people” I spent the most time with.
This only rings true if you are taking the time to read, listen and learn.
#3. Meet New People
If you want to improve your “average” (the influence of those you are around), this likely means you need to meet new people. I wish it was easier, but this one is in many ways harder than the first two, because it requires courage. But the good news is, each day that you grow, your courage does too.
Keep in mind, that if they’re meant to be your friend there is nothing to worry about because they will love you for you. If they make you feel bad about yourself or you walk away frustrated or defeated, then they weren’t going to be a good friend anyway. So there is no loss.
Suddenly, I don’t have to have everyone in the room like me anymore. I no longer mind if half the people don’t even notice me, I almost prefer that. All I need is to quietly find and connect with the shining souls, those who don’t judge, are full of love and want to create new connections.
As a matter of fact, once I realized this, I started doing things that I wouldn’t have done before. Like a few months ago, when we were driving around and I spotted an open house. Even though it was way out of our price range, I asked Corey to go on an adventure with me inside this house! Inside, I would find one of the coolest realtors, conversation flowed easily with her and we soon found many things in common, a love for old homes (she even mentioned she loves design inspiration from Fixer Upper ♥) and we both had similar age kids. She even shared that she was just barely pregnant with #2! I’m thinking she told me this because she thought I was a just stranger she likely wouldn’t see again.
We toured the house and then went on our way. But when I got in the car, I felt a strange and strong feeling that I didn’t want to lose this connection. I wondered if God would put her in my life again, or if He was leaving it up to me to act now. I was already in the car and I felt a little embarrassed to walk back in. But I put that feeling aside, because embarrassment has a way of trying to stop me from the most awesome things.
Somehow a childish courage filled me up, and I wrote down my number and ran back inside. I quickly said somethign along the lines of, “I’m new in town, this might be really weird but here’s my number if you want to text me and have a play date sometime with our kids.”
I left trying to have no expectation, which obviously was a little hard. Thankfully, just 2 minutes down the road, my phone buzzed with a text from her!
This might sound really easy for some of you but for others it will take an extra ounce of confidence and courage but either way you really have nothing to lose – you’ll either have a new friend or have went through an experience that made you that much braver.
This is something we’ll be announcing next week, a project we’ve been working with more heart and soul than I even knew was possible.
If you’re on a journey (or want to start your journey) of deeper personal and spiritual growth, a more fulfilling life, and a new friendship, you won’t want to miss this!
Make sure you’re on our newsletter so you don’t miss the unveiling…
The energy we put out is the energy we attract.
Shine the beautiful light you were given.